Two intersections away from the liquor store, it was where I began my celebration. I opened the first bottle of Jack Daniels, and within one gulp I was already disgusted by the indescribable taste of the beverage. However, it was not the taste, but the impact of this beverage that I was concerned with.
Then, I began to softly sing to myself an amusing melody, ‘One bottle. Two bottles. Three bottles. Smash! One bottle. Two bottles. Three bottles. Smash!’ Whilst I repeatedly sang this peculiar tune, I continued to consume the alcohol. I drunk at least four 250ml bottles of Jack Daniels within 10 minutes! Although this might be a probable approximation, however de facto in the state of mind that I was in, I was most likely unable to do any simplistic mathematics. And I am sure that I am not the first man to have had this struggle, to lack reason whilst being intoxicated.
Some time later…
The ground swayed under my feet. I thought that the apocalypse had begun. This cycle was unstoppable. The ground’s vibrations moved me backwards and forwards. With this new perspective, I was certain that I will soon be dead.
Some time later…
Another vision. This time I held a bottle of Jack Daniels. I began to drink it. The substance was unusual. I felt a bit dazed and confused. Then, I realised that I drunk a slimy, and gloomy substance of an odour of a wild animal, of a reptile.
Then, from the bottle of Jack Daniels that I held, a snake appeared. I was bewildered by the appearance of this reptile. Thus, I immediately dropped the bottle. The snake disappeared from my sight. The silence lasted only microseconds.
Then, I listened intensely. A definitive sound resonated from the carrier bag that I carried the other bottles of Jack Daniels in. The bottles appeared to manifest a serenade of sobbing snakes. I could clearly and distinctively hear their mourning. I rationally thought that I had no choice but to free them. I took three bottles and smashed them upon the floor. Then, the silence remained for minutes, yet the snakes that were trapped in the bottles died right in front of my eyes. A tear rolled gently downwards from the bottom of my right eye.
Then, I thought without any logical basis that, ‘I shall consume these snakes in order to save them.’ Thus, I opened the remaining three bottles and I stuffed the snakes from the Jack Daniels bottles into my stomach. I felt a strong sense of warmth inside. Now, I felt confident that the snakes were safe.
However, I slowly felt an intensifying pain within my stomach; I thought that this was due to the weight of the snakes. I knew that I had to free these snakes. Thus, I attempted to extricate them from inside of me. It took me a long period of time and hence when I finished, I was exhausted. Furthermore, I was covered in the slimy- gloomy substance of these snakes. This substance sunk into my clothes. Although, I suffered mentally and physically, however I was satisfied that now, my three baby snakes could live!
As my maternal role was over, I felt confident to calmly lay down upon the ground. However, after I had taken only two deep breaths, three grizzly bears entered the setting. These bears stood up straight. Each bear held one of my babies, my beloved snakes, as if they were police-batons. These bears swung them, my babies, in the air, as if the snakes were their lassos. The bears smiled malevolently at me; it was their sign to begin the beating. Then, the brutal beasts began to swipe at me viciously. I was powerless and motionless. I could not resist. After minutes of torturing me, one of them leaned over towards me and roared.
Yet, this roar was distinct. It was the roar of a lion. Then, a wild lion appeared upon the scene; the lion’s arrival ensured that the bears retreated swiftly away. I saw their petrified eyes. Now, I felt relief. And drifted into a slumber.